Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
