well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
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