i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
What drink are we having for lunch?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
