does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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