So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
