Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
