am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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