His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
