Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
it's great music for shaving your balls
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Mom said you looked used
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
