when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
