I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize