I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
