it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
The feeling are messing with the penis
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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