walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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