how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize