he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
