ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You need a sexual gate keeper
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
