I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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