You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
