What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize