My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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