apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
