It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
My day in three words: secret purse cake
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
