what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize