So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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