she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
