I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
