He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We left the knife in your bed.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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