I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
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