Having a random hookup so left but love u
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize