the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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