R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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