Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
