i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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