I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
