Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Randomize
