If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
