in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
