I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I stole a fireplace last night.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
