garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
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