he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize