is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
