i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize