Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
