I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
farters have to be the big spoon...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
