Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
