You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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