called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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