cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize