Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
