Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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