69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I can't turn off my feet"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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